I’ve been infatuated with her for quite some time now and I long for her when I’m away. But it wasn’t love at first
sight; I can still recall standing in front of the Brandenburg Gate,
squinting overwhelmingly at map, trying to find my bearing in vain.
The first time around, Berlin came across as daunting and scattered. Since then, I’ve visited this city several
times, and now I'm back again. But while I’m starting to wrap my head around her physical form, she's still very elusive. Don’t you hate it when you know that there’s a story that
needs to be told, yet you struggle to grasp it? You see, although I’ve always
felt a deep connection with this city, I haven’t been able to put into words. Not
until now that is.
A German friend of mine once told me that Berliners live the
carefree way. If you’re in Berlin, you’ll sense it straight away, but it goes
beyond the countless subcultures people identify themselves with or the buzzing
artsy scene in Kreuzberg. The people you'll meet aren't all metal studded punks with neon green hair or pierced goths: Berliners, no matter how
uninteresting or extravagant their lifestyles might seem, all share a common demeanor; they are uninhibited and non-judgmental. Unlike other German cities, living in Berlin isn’t about
conforming to rules or expectations;
instead, Berliners are refreshingly liberal and most importantly, it's genuine.
So, why is Berlin so different than your average traditional
German city? I’ve lived in Dresden for four years and they’re lightyears apart. So is Munich or Frankfurt. Just like these cities, Berlin has had
to endure many hardships. In the 20th century alone, it was the
backdrop of many world changing events, whether it was the rise of the Nazi
party and the terror that followed, the invasion by an equally terrifying
Communist regime, the Russian-imposed division of the East from the rest of
Berlin, or the end of the Cold War, just to mention a few. Indeed, this city, like no other, has had to
endure suffering and destruction.
The ghosts from periods past are omnipresent in Berlin. You can see them in the bullet-riddled columns
outside the Pergamon, which bear witness to countless adolescents who
perished defending the city in vain from Russian retribution. You can perceive the past still hauntingly
alive in the murals, which narrate a time when people were stuck within the bleak
confines of paranoia; or the bland buildings surrounding the Ostbahnhof, relics
from the Cold War frozen in time; or Alexanderplatz with its vast open space, a bleak reminder that at any time somebody could be watching you.
So, once again, why Berlin? What makes it so special? I
think it’s the dignity with which she has managed to bounce back from all the
mishaps. Many cities in Germany and elsewhere have been through a lot of
suffering over the years, but Berlin’s resilience is what sets her apart from
the rest. In my eyes, she was able to come to terms with its horrendous past
and rather than resenting or succumbing to the trauma, she has let herself be
textured by it. Ironically, by letting
herself be shaped by the events that were forced upon her, Berlin has managed
to stay true to her own identity.
So it’s no wonder why Berliners are such a distinct breed. The
feeling of self-efficacy they exude mirrors the dignity she has so humbly
resorted to over the course of the years. The victories and the downfalls were
many but they’ve all learned to coexist with one another just like her buildings where the old and the new blend harmoniously with one another. In any other place they simply wouldn't fit, yet in Berlin it all makes sense.
I guess the reason I keep coming here is my yearning for her transcendence.
